Working hard all week at being awesome definitely pays off on Sunday mornings. Sunday morning is when I get spoiled by Col and the girls. They include:

- Sleeping in
- Not having to make breakfasts
- Having breakfast made for me which is hard because most morning foods make me nauseous and it takes a talented kinda person to create something I’ll eat and enjoy
- Not having to make coffee and having someone offer refills
- Laying in bed, pillows propped behind me with my laptop
- Not being the parent the girls go to for more water, pancakes, booger removal, bum wiping or fight intervention
- Col playing good music loudly and keeping the TV off – this earns him many smart man points. Waking up to TV on the Radio makes my heart happy – this earns him many awesome man points. Right now he’s playing Explosions in the Sky on a Sunday morning while I’m laying in bed drinking coffee I did not make. And that? Those points cannot be discussed on a PG rated blog
- Someone that is not me cleaning the morning Explosions in the Kitchen
- A hot shower in a bathroom with the door locked. A long shower. A shower in which exfoliation will take place and Lush products will be used. A shower from which I’ll emerge baby soft, smooth, moisturized and relaxed rather than just clean and smelling good

And then I’ll slowly morph back into the family dynamic and we’ll head out to enjoy the sun, have dinner at my mom’s house and get ready to begin another week.

These Sunday mornings though? They carry me. So thank you to my three love bugs – they are much appreciated. xo

Obviously by the title here, my mind is on a creative hiatus – please excuse the general thought vomit this post will consist of.

1. Career

This has been the longest work week of my life by far. Why? Because when I leave my desk with it’s picturesque view of Mt. Baker and the roof-top pool of the Four Seasons Hotel on Friday, I will be officially part-time. No more calling in sick, no more feeling guilty, no more walking in the next day fearing for my job.

That being said, I’m busy. Busier than I’ve ever been in my career. You see, I went back to work full-time last September when my mind was occupied with things it shouldn’t have been occupied with. And then there was the fallout, drama, pain, therapy, recovery and most importantly, rebuilding my own seriously bruised and battered relationship with Colin. It wasn’t until the very end of April of this year that my head was finally IN my work – and I was dreadfully behind.

Literally, there were documents date stamped with October 2008 that I had pushed off. So, for the month of May, I was swamped with catching up. Working OT from home and not billing my hours, etc. – all out of guilt for a combination of fucking the dog and personal issues that flooded me from September to April.

When I look back, I am nothing short of shocked I still have a career there. But I do, so I won’t stew in the negative “what ifs”.

These days, I feel like a super star at work. I’m almost 100% up to date, my boss comes to me first for everything because I produce quality work that he can trust and I almost feel like I could continue full-time and be happy. But. There are a few things I’m really excited about…

2. My kids

Needless to say, being a full-time working mommy comes with it’s disadvantages – like spending two hours a day with your babies. The few hours I do have with them M-F aren’t one on one type things either. My favourite time of day has always been the 20 minute walk to and from school because rain or shine, it’s just the three of us, holding hands, talking, singing and laughing. Quality time. When we get home though, it’s go, go, go. I usually key down with a glass of wine and my lappy and then it’s dinner, clean up, laundry, baths, bed, etc. Hectic stuff.

But weekends eventually come and with the beautiful summery weather we’ve actually been out doing stuff as a family of four or three depending on Colin’s work schedule. Last weekend it was just them and me and I’ve never had such a great time just the three of us out and about. The weekend before that, the four of us jam-packed the entire weekend and created memories the girls still talk about.

That’s what this is all about. Creating memories for them. Time spent in front of the TV or in their room playing are not times they remember. Rather, it’s being out, seeing new things, going places we’ve never been before, exploring and wandering – basically what Col and I did every weekend during our 4 childless years. We’re doing it with our kids now and those are the things that stick with them and what they share at school with their teachers and friends.

In other words, I can’t wait for part-time to start so I can create a new adventure for the three of us at least once a week.

3. Sun

I mentioned it already, but since we’ve had a consecutive five days of sunshine in Vancouver, it’s officially summer!! Layers have been peeled off, skin has been exfoliated, flowy skirts and tanks have been pulled out of their drawers, bathing suits, sunglass, sun hats and beach towels are on call. Ahhh, summer.

I don’t think there is a single person out there who adores sunshine like I do. Seasonal Affective Disorder has it’s way with me from September through April. I gain weight, I whine, I pick up travel brochures and plan fake trips to sunny places, I look at my white skin and cringe…

And then my darling sun comes out and kisses my face and shoulders and all is right in the world again. Sunlight flowing through the blinds is enough to bounce out of bed and start my day early, plans are made, body is smooth, moisturized and sun-kissed, hair is air dried and worn long and wavy or piled into a loose bun and it’s a pleasure to do most everything just feeling the sunshine glowing around me.

Yeah, sun! My wonder drug.

4. Fitness and Health

Oh my. Oh my oh my oh my. My ass is getting stomped by EA Active already after two nights. The first night we did a full body workout and the next day I couldn’t walk. I whimpered to Colin on the phone from work, “Please, no lower body tonight…PLLLLEEEEEASE”. So he created an amazing workout last night that consisted of shooting hoops, catching, throwing and hitting the baseball, tennis, boxing and a bit of resistance work. Then he led me through his own routine of abs and seated rows and UGH.

Oh, and whoever invented jumping lunges should be hanged. Damn you.

I’m still sore from Day 1 and now my arms are done, too. But I must stick with it and get to know Active because come Monday, June 1, I’m starting the EA Active 30-Day Challenge where I will proceed to get my body sculpted for summer and the dress I’ll be wearing to our friends wedding at the end of July. I want it to accentuate my waist and legs, not be floral, matronly or frumpy and must be worthy of a full night of dancing and mingling with dear friends without feeling self conscious. I have work to do. ‘Nuff said.

Also with health is a complete 360 in our eating habits. I’m avoiding fast food and eating out like the plague and well as limiting wheat products and sugar. I’m trying to eat mostly lean protiens and ton of fresh greens for dinners. Lunches are consisting of healthy, lean sandwiches or soup and salads.

Eventually, eating lunch out will be a thing of the past as I plan to prepare both mine and Colin’s lunches everyday starting next week. Breakfast is still a bit of a struggle for us, but we’re going to hit up Costco and look for a nice protein bar or something else quick and easy. That’s our main problem with breakfast – time. Any suggestions?

5. Money

Col and I have a 4th birthday party in Disneyland to plan and we’d like to have that booked by the end of July. In essence that means that the reigns are being harshly tightened as we want to save and pay cash for this trip rather than throw it on a credit card and come back to a hefty debt load.

Things are being severely cut – there will be no Whistler trip for our birthdays this year, nor will there be any extravagance for either birthday or Father’s Day. We’ve accepted that fact and plan on just being together without throwing down cash to do cool things. Besides, going part-time is going to be a chunk of income we don’t have anymore – and we MUST adapt. Shattering our daughter’s dreams of spending their 4th birthday with the Disney Princesses is NOT an option.

6. Turning 30

In a few weeks, I’ll leave my 20s behind and despite fears that this would be a tough one, all I have to say is, “Don’t let the door hit your ass on the way out”.

Seriously, I just know that the next ten years are going to be my healthiest physically, emotionally and mentally; my relationships with Colin, my daughters, our family and friends are going to flourish; there will hopefully be a balance and zen in life that allows me to deal with these onsets of the blahs, craziness and depressions I seem to get once in awhile.

Oh, and there’s that thing they say about women in their 30s

My 20s brought me some great things – Colin, my career, my girls – but they were also filled with angst, self hate, depression, anger, regret, never being content, hurt, hate, loathing, creating drama for myself and others, selfishness, loneliness and the feeling of being more an overgrown teenager than a woman. To be honest, the last two years of my 20s have been the worst of my life so far and I am so ready to start a fresh new decade with these three beautiful souls I call my family, our extended families and good friends.

A few short weeks away from my 30th birthday, I feel different. My energy levels and spirit are those of someone much younger than me, but my head and heart feel all grown up.

I like this place.

Does anyone else not care as much as I do that Twilight came out on DVD? Does anyone else feel like they can’t escape the hype? Like your head will explode if you see or hear the word Twilight again? Has anyone else not read the books, nor have any intention to? Same with seeing the movies? Did anyone else from Vancouver have no idea the “cast” was/is here – whomever the f*ck that consists of? Will there be a witch hunt if I exclaim, “Die stupid vampires, die”?

I hate vampires, now more than ever. Anyway.

What I love? Hockey Night in Canada.

Yup, that’s right. A Saturday night tradition pretty much before I can remember and has now carried through to our little girls. I’m sure my man and little missys will be suited up in their jerseys and the girls will have their hockey sticks and scrimmage. We caught their first one last weekend and it was way too cute for words. We were proud, proud hockey parents.

Speaking of which, mine and Colin’s most favourite commercial of the moment …

And why the f*ck is Bud Light the official beer of the NHL? I cry.

WEAK. Budweiser should really be banned from associating it’s name with hockey, period.

Personally, I find this equally or more disturbing as my (and uhh, Sandra Bullock’s) West Coast Chopper hottie, Jesse James, starring in Celebrity Apprentice. *Sigh*

Just. Plain. Wrong.

Hmm, what else is new?

Oh yeah, Colin and I started a new tradition called Friday Movie Night. It’s a family thing with a new movie, all theatre style. It’s so fun and the girls love it. Last night we watch Beverly Hills Chihuahua (note: the movies are the girls choice). It was as bad as it sounds. Don’t buy it like we did. It’s going to take many, many years before that one pays for itself.

Last weekend was Wall-E. Wow, I was so hyped and prepped to bawl my heart out at this movie and I found it to be cute, but meh! Didn’t cry. I guess I’ve become more of a hardened bitch than originally thought. I actually fell asleep during it the first time, heh, I suck at watching movies. Oh well, at least that’s a good one for the collection.

Another cool thing about Friday Movie Night is that the munchkins stay up until about 10pm, sometimes later depending on what time Daddy gets home from work and do you know what that equals??

The ENTIRE family sleeping in till like, 10am. Unheard of before FMN.

Other stuff:

• Taking an internet break has been one of the best and freeing things I’ve ever done in my entire life. These updates are kind of pleasant to do. I haven’t read a blog/Twitter’d, hell, I haven’t opened my laptop in what feels like a long-ass time. I don’t feel like such an addict to the internet anymore – yeah, I think I had a few slight addiction problems. Novel, I know. I’m starting to really regret wasting so much of my life over the past two years online, it’s sad. No wonder everyone was so disappointed – it all makes sense now. But I’m breathing and living again and it’s fabulous.

• The girls and I are getting much better. Callie is the only one still in somewhat of a sick misery, but she’s slowly coming out of it.

• It’s sunny, woot!

• I’m still quit smoking. Yeah me. It’s been over a week now, so I’m on a roll. Last night I was close to sparking one with a glass of wine and I decided on gum instead. Mmmmm, wine and gum. It’s all just mental at this point.

• Today I begin therapy. I’ve recently been made aware that it’s no longer a choice, rather “critical” for my mental wellness and while at first I was in a bit of denial, I’m pretty excited (and nervous) to start working on getting better. I very much appreciate the eye-opening, tough love I received as well as the love and support I’m getting from Colin and the fam. Thanks all.

Now, I’m off to fold laundry for the next four hours. It sure does pile up when you’re sick for two weeks.

Oh yeah, and for tonight.

Lots of win vibes to the Canucks and Senators (as if they need them but still). And to the NHL, you will not catch me nor anyone I associate with drinking Bud Light with our hockey (or ever for that matter). Just sayin’.

…for Friday!

…to leave my work where it belongs. At work.

…to not feel guilty if I do not spend Sunday “catching up” at my desk in a deserted, cold office.

…for payday tomorrow.

…to go to bed late Friday and Saturday and maybe just maybe, sleep in a bit.

…to make coffee on Saturday morning, curl up on the couch in my pink chenille cardigan and read each and every outstanding post in my Google Reader. I crazy miss you guys!

…to clean my bathroom to a shine.

…to purge and cleanse all clutter zones.

…to read by the fire, curled up in a white armchair, glass of wine in reach.

…to watch more Gilmore Girls, season one.

…to soak my tired bod in a hot bath.

…to maybe go get a quick pedicure.

…to do a home manicure.

…to do a massive grocery shopping, bright and early on Saturday morning.

…for Sunday!

…for Super Bowl (and I despise football)

…for the Super Bowl party I’m throwing (did I mention I despise football?)

…to prepare the menu and appies.

…for non-stop MGD. Seriously. I love that crap but can’t justify it being Canadian and all. Except on Super Bowl Sunday.

…for Mojitos. Yes, any celebration calls for Mojitos.

…to have friends and family over to eat, drink and be merry.

…to be the hugely excited dork I always am on Super Bowl Sundays.

…to throw my money down on Arizona. Only because I know people who live there and other people who probably really enjoy Arizona football. I’m rooting for their team

…to enjoy my love bugs, Callie and Lily.

…to take them out to do something fun and energy burning.

…to get their new butterfly umbrellas, rain coats and boots (if it rains) and jump in some puddles. (Where are my magical rubber rainbow boots when I need them?)

…to relax.

…to smile.

…to be warm.

…to be comfortable.

…to go slow.

…to play.

…to enjoy.

…to taste.

…to cheers.

…to love.

I cannot wait for this weekend.

I had a New Year’s post all ready to go, but you know what?

Tonight I’m just going to decompress after an insane Monday back in the office, do my own thing and ramble for a bit in my favourite way, point form.

- I’m talking to a criminal defense lawyer I used to work for tomorrow about my brother’s case. This guy has won four out of five murder trials and has set precedents in Canada/US border drug seizure trials. He’s THE man, and if he can do all that, I’m pretty sure he’ll be able to get my brother out of a mischief charge. He’ll probably chuckle and charge a fortune but at least Jeff won’t have a criminal record thanks to a psychotic drama queen.

- Speaking of which, she tried to phone my brother today and when he didn’t answer, she sent him a message on his Blackberry telling him she was sorry. HA.

- Callie and Lily have the best Daddy in the world. He spent the day with them today while I was at work and will do the same until Wednesday afternoon when I’m off for four and a half days! Today they made the most adorable cards for me and when I got home, the girls were so happy. I could tell it was a good day for all three of them and that makes ME happy. I bought them stuff to make cookies tomorrow (okay, it’s Pilsbury pre-made) and I’ve heard talks of making one big cookie, lol. Should be interesting.

- Whitney’s spin-off from The Hills is on MTV tonight and I’m all over it. I can’t wait till 10pm. Shut up.

- Before that I’m going to go soak in a hot bath for an hour. Should I use a bath bomb or bubble bar? Or maybe some jasmine and rose bath oil? Hmmm, so many bath things to choose from. I’m basically in heaven here.

- After Whitney’s spin-off, I’m going to attempt Gilmore Girls Season One, Episode 2. It only took me since Christmas Day to get through Episode 1. I’m not even talking about disc one or season one here. Episodes, haha. You can tell how much I actually watch TV. The moment it goes on, I fall asleep.

- I got a new phone number today and it sucks! Colin joked today that you could just blindly punch your keypad and get through to me. There’s no rhyme or reason to it and I’ll put money on myself carrying that so-called phone number around with me for at least a year. There’s nothing worse than being asked for your number by the bank teller or librarian, squinting your eyes in deep thought, shaking your head and saying, “I dunno….”

- I’m quitting smoking on Thursday. I know, I know. I’ve said it and done it 40+ times over the past few years, but January 1, 2009 is the day. I HATE smoking. I hate coughing. I hate smelling. I hate standing in the cold freezing to get my fix. I hate the control something that’s slowly killing me has over me. The only time I’ve ever been successful quitting was when I did it on a January 1st and it lasted for over three years. It’s time. I’m not even phased either, I effing hate smoking and refuse to burn money and my lungs like that for another week even.

- I recently found my Christmas bonus cheque which miraculously didn’t make it into my bank account to spend on presents. I just deposited it today. Score. See? Karma can be very sweet sometimes. Or perhaps I’m just an airhead who forgot her Christmas bonus cheque at the bottom of her purse. Nah, I like the karma thing better!

Okay, it’s 9pm. Time to go hop in the bath and get this night started (is there anyone out there watching Whitney’s show, too? Didn’t think so!).

Sweet dreams!